How to deal with the annoying co-workers!

Got Annoying Co-Workers? Here's what you do: There may be someone at work who hovers around you, talking incessantly. Or perhaps you're dealing with a chronic "borrower" who takes things from your desk without asking. Sometimes the rude behavior of a certain colleague can send you over the edge. We call the people and events that infringe on your personal territory at work "Boundary Busters." The co-worker whose voice is so loud that you can't concentrate is a Boundary Buster. A customer who obtains your home phone and calls you on the weekend is a Boundary Buster, as is the boss who intercepts, opens and reads your mail. Because their actions invade your personal space, Boundary Busters can be a source of great emotional and mental distress. The best way to identify a Boundary Buster is to notice your emotional response to their behavior. Recurring sensations of anger, frustration, irritation or annoyance usually indicate that you are in a situation where someone or something is crossing one of your boundaries. More often than not, these space invaders are oblivious to the adverse effects of their behavior. For this reason, your best bet for managing these workplace irritants, is to figure out a constructive way to communicate your boundary. Here are the steps: 1. Identify exactly who or what is encroaching on your terrain 2. Assess the options available to you 3. Communicate what you want in clear, concrete terms, and 4. Follow-up with a business tool. Here's an example of how it works: You have an extremely chatty co-worker who approaches you at all hours of the workday. You see this person walking toward you, and your back tightens. 'Oh God,' you think, 'Here we go again.' You identify that listening to this person talk endlessly has become a source of stress for you. You take a few deep breaths, just to release the tension you hold from fielding this person's verbal neediness. You assess your options: 'i could keep pretending to listen and allow Dan or Danielle to drain my energy or i could cut the conversation short by setting a boundary.' You communicate your boundary. Instead of being accusatory ("Would you just SHUT UP!?), you take a high road appraoch: "I'd like to hear your story, but I'm facing a deadline. Let's talk later." You follow-up with a business tool. In this case, you send an email thanking John or Mary for respecting your request, and repeating that you'll catch up later. Sounds easy, right? Then why do so few people do this? Because setting boundaries requires interpersonal communication skills that most people are not taught. Sincerely, Katherine and Kathi  Bestselling Authors of Working With You Is Killing Me